leonardcohenforum.com

I've decided to head up to the San Francisco show...not to meet Leonard, so don't go there lizzy!..but to enjoy an evening of music. (I checked out the "Conspiracy of Beards". They're on the bill with Anjani and it's thirty men singing LC exclusively and a capella. Works for me!)

If anyone from the forum is going and wants to meet-up at the venue, let me know. I'm too lazy to find old emails or look for posts to pm but I recall there's a few from the board who are going.

(No need to reply with anything "warm and fussy" dear lizzy. I'm always dieting and I'm gaining too much weight just reading your sugary posts. No carbs...no carbs! And I refuse to post one of those funny emoticons but you know what I mean.)

Grrrrrrr,

Dar

Geesh ! Like I would travel further than a 50-mile radius to see anyone, much less Leonard Cohen, right? Riiiiiight . Not to worry, Missy [not meant affectionately, sugar], ol' San Francisco t'ain't on my agenda.

"Warm and fuzzy"... I'm still reeling from your "Big Bear Hug" to BoHo . I guess since them thars have the potential of being crushers, it slid in under the wire as not being too warm and fuzzy fer ya. Nearly went a scramblin' fer some lemon, 'til I sussed it out.

I'm always dieting and I'm gaining too much weight just reading your sugary posts.

... and, obviously, I'm a diet breaker... good on me . As you said, no carbs... they turn to sugar, anyway.

D-LightId to read yer goin' to see Anjani !! Let's hear it for the Key of C . Conspiracy of Beards will be WayKool, too ... as opposed to FuzzyWarm, of course.

Good to see you back on here... now we've got a perfect pair... Dar and BoHo. Do NOT take that to be mush, though.


Love, Uh-Uh apologeeeeezzzz,
See ya' round, sugar sugar,
GRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr backatcha, Big Bear,
Lizzy

See...now what I meant when I said, "Don't go there, lizzy", was for lizzy to not start congratulating me on being able to entertain even the possibility of meeting LC. That sort of thing. And so lizzy thought I meant for "her" not to go to San Francisco. That's not what I meant by "don't go there". And I am not back to the forum because I would have to post more often than lizzy to be understood and even then it might not work. And I am not a damn big bear...that's what I get for hugging and mentioning dieting.

Grrrrrr,

Dar

And, see, I should be working but as soon as I post something to the forum I get caught up in trying to be understood. Story of my life!

And don't answer me lizzy. I can't have a conversation...I'm working!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

And don't answer me lizzy. I can't have a conversation...I'm working!

Well, that's too bad, Dar... cuz now I'm off work .

. . . when I said, "Don't go there, lizzy", was for lizzy to not start congratulating me on being able to entertain even the possibility of meeting LC.

If I went there, I'd have had to get gushy. Yeesh. Wouldn'ta wanted ta do that .

In fact, the way you say you meant it was the way I first took it... but, then, with all the hullaballoo about New York, well... hey, I decided to go there .

If you're not a big bear, how can you give a big bear hug ? These mixed metaphors are giving me a case of confusion.

And WHY are you talking about me in the third person, instead of to me? At least I took me lumps of sugar, straight in the eye, face to face.


Geesh!

Grrrrrr...
Little bear hug,
Lizzy

Ermm . . . Damn, Dar, Darlin' . . . just seeing your name in that pretty blue column, what an abso-deffo D'Lite!!1! Diet? WTF? You're fabulous the way you are (but, if you're giving up the Godivas? Couldja give 'em up here?). Neat you're going; hope others join you. Hope ValGoddess takes an LC Forum peek-see, yesterday. Today, I was remembering our little NG Project so, got G'oglin' and found most of it. It? *OUR* hit. 'Member? . . . Got all Damned Nostalgimental Don MacLeaning (loads of laundry . . .); Bye, Bye . . .

The URLS below our "masterpiece" (Au: Mistresspiece, surely? Ed.) tell a beautiful story, IMO. Y'Know . . . we coulda been on BROADway, we coulda been contenders, we coulda chorus-lined, taken show on the road, we coulda been High-Steppin' Hussies of the Order of the Unifight, erp, Unified, Heart of LC Harlots doing the CanCan. Restez en vie!* . . .

I'M YOUR WOMAN
By The Mud-Splurred B'Losin' Babes

If you want a cover
I’ll tell them what you want me to
And if you want a mother of a lover
I’ll ravish every inch of you
If you want to call me Lili Marlene
Or change the rules of your doctor game
You know you can
I'm your woman

If you want an angel
I’ll kneel and pray with you
If you want a devil
I’ll get down and play with you
But if you want to hang out with your wife
I will not take your knife
And end her bunny's life
That’s not a good plan
I’m your woman

If you want a hooker
I’ll happily make you pay
And if you want a fury
I'll screech and scream all day
But if you want a bitch
To help you scratch your itch
You’ll find me raw and rich
And soothing with a switch
At your command
I’m your woman

If you want a mother
I’ll make room for the child in you
And if you want some other
I won’t insist that you be true
But, if you’re craving multiple loves
I’ll wear the mask, you’ll wear the gloves
And we’ll sample every brand
You know we can
I’m your woman

Ah, the moon’s alright
But, the sun’s too bright
And the night can’t go to waste
I’ve been thumbing through
These pictures so blue
That cannot be replaced
Ah, but a woman never got her guy to come back
Not by doing some sleaze striptease
Or I’d dance for you, Baby
Going slow as you please
Little Red Riding Hood
Heidi on skis
Twirling the tassles
Hitting my knees
Heavy with perfume
Light as the breeze
Ah, Baby, can't you see
I aim to please
I’m your woman

If you want a virgin
I’ll sacrifice my lust to you
And if you need some urgin'
I’ll take the very thrust of you
If you want a strong girl, I'll be tough
But if you want a baby in the buff
Honey, I’ve got the stuff
And I'll pose deadpan
I'm your woman

If you want a climber
I’ll scale the highest walls for you
And if you want a rhymer
Well, there’s nothing that I cannot do
If you want a typer for your song
Or just a place where you belong
Well, then, hot damn
I’m your woman

If you want a moaner
I'll purr and growl for you
But, if you want a groaner
I’ll just learn to howl for you
If you’re seeking a concubine
Well, Honey, that’s just fine
Just show me where to sign
You know I can
I’m your woman

If you want a sucker
I’ll nurse you till your lips turn blue
And If you want a bitch to crack the whip
I'll snarl and snap a few for you
If you want the truth
I'll take the stand
If you want a liar
I'll swear to G-d and every man
I'm your woman

Ah, the sun's too bright
The heart’s too tight
And these feelings still hold sway
I’ve been lying here
So cold, so clear
Entranced by all you say
Ah, but a woman never kept a man in line
Not by trying hard to please
Or I'd bow to you baby
Yeah, I’d grovel and scrape
I’d pick up your shorts
And I’d hang up your cape
Worship your warts
And help you escape
If that’s your plan
I’m your woman

If you want a mistress
I’ll break in all your whips for you
But, if you want a waitress
I’ll make damned sure your coffee’s blue
If you want a slut who likes to rock
Or a saint who just wants to talk
Let’s make a plan
I’m your woman

If you want a poet
I'll write a bloody epic for you
And if you want to show it
I'll make damned sure it's perfect, too
If you want a babe who makes the grade
Who's full of spunk and never afraid
Well, by now, you understand
The design in this master plan
You know who I am
I'm your woman

If you want a distortionist
I’ll tell them what you told me to
And if you want a contortionist
I’ll hold the pose you hold me to
If you want a dame who won’t complain
One who’s certifiably insane
Here I stand
I’m your woman

If you want a woman
I`ll wear shades of burning ice for you
If you want a buddy
I´ll just practise being nice to you
If you need a nanny for the squeaker
Or a cute little hide-and-seeker
Here I stand
Over here — oh, here I am
I’m your woman

http://tinyurl.com/33cfte
http://tinyurl.com/34d77a

((((DAR)))) <---- In return for this DAR Bear-Hug Rumour? SLURP. YaY.

Love, Bo
* Fasten your seltbelts!
p.s. I didn't see your message; but, I did count the horseshes on my arse you'd returned (as I am sure many B'Lurkers in our B'Lurkatory did)
--
————>>>> NeWSSPLaSH <<<<————
JUDITH FITZGERALD WINS BADLY:
CLICK THROUGH THE RUNNERS-UP
TO THE FINAL POEM INKED BY NONE
OTHER THAN YOURS TRULIOUSLY:
http://www.chortler.com/33833badp.shtml
WHOM THE GODS WOULD DESTROY:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/temp.html
ADAGIOS III — ELECTRA'S BENISON, BOUND!
http://www.oberonpress.ca/titles.pl?v=new
JUDITH FITZGERALD'S EVER-EVOLVING WRITESITE:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/

LIZZYTICIOUS wrote:

DARLICIOUS wrote:And don't answer me lizzy. I can't have a conversation...I'm working!

Well, that's too bad, Dar... cuz now I'm off work .

. . . when I said, "Don't go there, lizzy", was for lizzy to not start congratulating me on being able to entertain even the possibility of meeting LC.

If I went there, I'd have had to get gushy. Yeesh. Wouldn'ta wanted ta do that .

In fact, the way you say you meant it was the way I first took it... but, then, with all the hullaballoo about New York, well... hey, I decided to go there .

If you're not a big bear, how can you give a big bear hug ? These mixed metaphors are giving me a case of confusion.

And WHY are you talking about me in the third person, instead of to me? At least I took me lumps of sugar, straight in the eye, face to face.


Geesh!

Grrrrrr...
Little bear hug,
Lizzy

Gr-r-oar!!1! Hill-Flippin'-Arious! Lizzy? Tell her, pls/tnx: Dar, C'mon. You make perfekk sense to Goddess EBS 'n' me. I'm picking up (Champ Amp, natch) all ratio, no static / noise on your frequency here in the Church of LC-Unity. (Necessity *is* the Mother of Insanity; I'm off the clock in about four hours . . . but have been practising guyzer-gushy sweet-treat repletes during this whole dronedit zoneditz de sweetmeatz):

Lizzy, I am hoping you are insomaniacal since a little bear hug? Gah! Oxymoronic, if you ask me. You still awake? No mutter. You're up early. I gotz other replies, aussi. But, U 2? Two mush.

Couldn't bear <*ahem*> not to let you know I'm working till 8 AM this rosy-fingered dawn and posting when I can between putting the clothes in the fax and the post in the washer during smoke breaks and hoping you're feeling like a million bic-flics and all this sweet-nuthiniana reminded me of the Archies singing "Sugar, Sugar" and damn you both; now, it's on permanent replay in my brain. The only solution? (Sugar and WaterWorks?) Stick it right back on ya; git gooey wit it; ice the cakewalk. BIG BEAR HUGZ 2 the purty pair o' U 'cause here's a blast from the past brought to you by some gushifying you know who ('cause I'm confectionistically devoted to the both of you, 2):

Sugarz, ah, honey honies
You are my candy Grrlz
And you've got me wanting you
Honies, ah, sugar sugarz
You are my candy Grrlz
And, you've got me flaunting you
I just can't believe the loveliness of loving youze
(I just can't believe it's true
Neither can anybody else
But, what can you do
When you post in a Zoo)
I just can't believe the one
Two love this feeling, too
(I just can't believe it's true
Gonna stick like goo
'Cause I iz stuck on youze)
Ah, sugar, ah honey, hornies
You are my candy Grrlz
And you've got me wanting youze
Ah, honey, ah, sugar sugarz
You are my candy Grrlz
And you've got me flaunting youze
When I kissed you, Grrlz
I knew how sweet a kiss could be
I got my chops off Madonna
And saccharine queen Brittany
(I know how sweet a kiss can be)
Like the summer sunshine
Pour your sweetness over me
(Pour your sweetness over me)
Sugar, pour a little sugar on it, Honies
Pour a little sugar on it, Babies
I'm gonna make your life so sweet
yeah yeah yeah
Pour a little sugar on it, oh, yeah
Pour a little sugar on it, Honies
Pour a little sugar on it, Babies
I'm gonna make your life so sweet
Yeah yeah yeah
Pour a little sugar on it, Honies
Ah, sugar, ah, honey honies
You are my candy Grrlz
And, you've got me wanting you
Oh, honey honey, sugar sugarz
You are my candy Grrlz
And, you've got me taunting you
'Cause if you can risk being quiet resisters
Then, ask yourself:
Who unconditionally loves ya, Sisters
Who'd lay it on so thickly thweet
You'd be standing on the corner
Where Slurp meets Sugar Street
And, you've got to admit it
I'm being uncharacteristicslly
All lightness and sweet
Not barking, not snarking
Not missing a single beat
'Cause U 2 2gether
Jes' knock yours truly
Off her candy-flossical feet

There's no accounting for waste.

Still, "Honey?" Bobby Goldsboro? Don't go *there* (since that's the sappiest crappiest "song" ever written, IMO) . . . Oh, K. Someone left the cake in the rain? That thang, too.

Love to both sweet irresistible youze.

BoHopelessly Beyond the Beyond in the Silly Long-Gone Dawn Watching the Gingerbread Clock in the Yadda-Yadda-Yawn
p.s. J.K.? Think Pip-Squawk
p.p.s. It's actually "International Dare 2 B Silly Day," eh?
--
JUDITH FITZGERALD'S EVER-EVOLVING WRITESITE:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/
J.F. ON LIAN LUNSON'S I'M YOUR MAN
http://www.leonardcohenfiles.com/boholian.html
THE ITEM THAT HE SENT HER:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/leonardcohen.html
LEONARD COHEN'S OPEN BOOK OF LONGING:
http://tinyurl.com/yno7z7
ADAGIOS III — ELECTRA'S BENISON, BOUND!
http://www.oberonpress.ca/titles.pl?v=new
VERMONT'S BUCKEYE ON OLSON & FITZGERALD:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/bobbuckeye.html
WHOM THE GODS WOULD DESTROY:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/temp.html
JOANNA M. WESTON ON ORESTES' LAMENT:
http://tinyurl.com/ysrx3l

post deleted

Before I go back into hibernation, the bear references and all that, one last long-winded personal pm type post.

It is true that "back in day" of the newsgroup we had a way with words.
We ranted and raved, before blogs became the rage, and the group was less structured and, at times, vindictive, hurtful and vengeful but it was real. Too real.

It certainly was a much more conversational place, which our lizzy continues to this day!, but The Forum has replaced the bar where we hung out, fought, cried, and died. Many of the old-timers have faded away.

In the old ng I would have flat-out shared that lizzy drives me nuts with her "mind-reading" and long-winded posts, that it takes me a day to process Judith's "free-speech", that I can't understand how LC fans can have such divergent opinions on politics, religion, other musicians, and just others. That I can be as judgmental as the rest of "you" and be dead wrong at times.

Jarkko has created a new and improved place to share all things LC and it's working. Not the way the ng used to be. We can't go home again and who would want to.

Virtual reality doesn't work in the long run to understand someone's personality, in spite of the liberal use of emoticons!

It is wonderful to see Judith posting to the Forum again and even if lizzy drives me crazy sometimes what should it matter to me? She hugs me anyway and keeps the forum lively. So who am I to judge?

So...to avoid any further embarrassment or hugs or slugs from a .45, I will retreat back to the den again.

Here's to the few who forgive what you do.

Hallelujah and Amen!

Dar

post deleted

John K. wrote:

If you want a mother
I’ll make room for the child in you

From the link I see this looks like a joint effort.

I just have to say that whoever wrote the above quote, this is truly great.

Seconded. I think it belongs to Baubo or ValGoddess. I have all the printouts and emails together in a folder. When I find it, I'll let you know. Joint effort's right. Ol' Bill's Bar. We razed the place; last I heard, it was still condemned. Great song, no? Well, *we* think so. So, @#&@%# YOU!!!1!

LvHgz, Bo
p.s. The clock's ticking. It's a six-letter word you use everyday, year in, you're out Strriiiiike!!3! (Js lost, IOW ) So, J/K.iddin' . . . K? K.
--
————>>>> NeWSSPLaSH <<<<————
JUDITH FITZGERALD WINS BADLY:
CLICK THROUGH THE RUNNERS-UP
TO THE FINAL POEM INKED BY NONE
OTHER THAN YOURS TRULIOUSLY:
http://www.chortler.com/33833badp.shtml
WHOM THE GODS WOULD DESTROY:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/temp.html
ADAGIOS III — ELECTRA'S BENISON, BOUND!
http://www.oberonpress.ca/titles.pl?v=new
JUDITH FITZGERALD'S EVER-EVOLVING WRITESITE:
http://www.judithfitzgerald.ca/

This song is notta, de rien, nothing less than ***ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT***!!! What a thrill of a deal it had to be for all of you as your creativity went into high gear to come up with these splendid lyrics. I just haven't been up to commenting on it. I would love to see all of you quirky and wonderful women gather to prance and preen as you perform this as the opening act for Leonard.

I, too, was very drawn to the unique truth of the concept behind the lyric regarding pregnancy, John. I don't know who Baubo is, but I sure know who ValGoddess is; so, if I had to bet on it, I'd vote for ValGoddess as the penness of this great lyric.

Thanks for bringing it here, BoHo .


Best Wishes to all of you,
Lizzy

post deleted

That's the part that stood out for me, too; the lyric working simultaneously on three levels... the womb as room, the room in the house, and as accommodation of a child into their lives.


~ Lizzy